Thursday, September 17, 2009

Escaped!... Day 309 16SEP09

I'm not quite sure if the doctors let us out because they thought Joshua truly is well enough to go home OR if they kicked us out due to all the mischief Joshua was getting into! The good thing is that Joshua's anc has reached 482 and we are back at home and not due to go into clinic until Monday.

Joshua was either bored, frustrated or just mad last night because he decided to do something that totally shocked his father and I. Late in the evening he asked me how to spell "cancer". So I told him. I asked him where he was writing the word and if it was in my journal. He said yes. I should have investigated a little more, but I was busy working on other things. When Lee showed up late last night to see Joshua and wish him a good night, he noticed where Joshua had actually written the word CANCER.

Drum Roll Please....................................Joshua wrote


Inside I wanted to laugh and cry. He was right! Cancer does Suck. But then I wanted to strangle him because he wrote on the hospital wall and he even signed his named to it! I also knew at 11:30 at night I was the one that had to try and clean it off!
So this is what I told Joshua.....First, A little word of advice. If you are going to vandalize a wall which is totally wrong, don't sign your name to it. And Second, What were you thinking? Joshua, of course, was upset that he got into trouble, and he did realize that it was wrong. He has never written on a wall before, and if he would have written that on his bedroom wall at home I would have left it up!

Sometimes you get so caught up in the clinic visits, hospital stays, blood draws, port accesses, xrays, chemo, pills, platlets, HGB, WBC and every other thing that goes with cancer. that you lose sight of how your child is actually feeling deep down inside! Joshua is so brave and strong sometimes that he doesn't really let his true emotions show. If I had my way, I would let Joshua write Cancer Sucks Mom on everything he could. Cancer not only affects the child but the entire family. We not only have to deal with our child but the other problems that go with it, like trying to figure out whether we make the mortgage payments or buy food for the family. We deal with trips that are cut short or even canceled at the last minute due to fevers and the hundreds of hospital bills we receive. Our family is holding strong and the love and support that we receive from our family and friends is overwhelming sometimes. We are very grateful to have all of you in our lives.

I would like to remind everyone that the Month of September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. I know that times are tight but please consider contributing in some way to help the children and their families that have been touched with cancer. There are many wonderful organizations that we have mentioned in the past that have helped our family a great deal. Also, If you would like to make a direct donation to help Joshua we will be putting a donation link on the blog in the next week or two.

I would also like everyone to send out some very special prayers to our cancer families at St Joseph Hospital. Please include them all! This week has been very rough on a couple of families and when one family is affected, we are all affected. Please pray for all of our angels!


Mrs. Lewis said...

So glad to hear that you are home and back together again. I miss you guys, you're always in my prayers. So Joshua wants to express himself artistically? No worries, just put a piece of paper up first. Try taping a piece under the table, lay on the floor and pretend you're Leonardo DaVinci painting on the ceiling! Whatever it takes my friend, stay strong!!!
Luv, Ms. Lydia

Nonna said...

Hey Snuggle Monkey,

I am overjoyed to hear you are home!!!! This last stay was just too long.

Monkey, sometimes we try so long and so hard to be brave and strong. Then we hit a wall we simply cannot deal with and the emotion has to go somewhere - you chose something solid, stable and impenetrable at which to hurl your frustration and anger. While I can't condone the choice, I can understand the overwhelming need. Hang in there Mighty Warrior - you are The Champion and you will get through this nightmare.

Tons of Love, Hugs and Kisses,


Laura and Frank said...

I am so happy you are home!!!!

I'm a bad influence and would have left it on the wall and drawn flowers around it. Your Mommy is much better at this than I would be. I agree CANCER SUCKS BIG TIME and no one, especially our precious children, should have to go through all of the crap that goes with it.

But then I think how much you have taught to so many people with your kick butt attitude and you are truly amazing! You and your family are always in our thoughts and prayers and we love you.

Laura and Frank

Jamie(Sister) said...

Yay you got to go home!!
Whoo hoo i bet you and mommy were full of joy. =) Yay your anc is finally up there again Joshy. Thats great. =)

Joshua Edward........You did what to the wall??? Oh my goodness buddy. We wish that we could take all of the pain and bad stuff that you are going through away. =( I know cancer sucks love bug but you cant be writing it on the hospital wall goofy butt. Hey i got an idea... why dont you get a journal and write down all of your thoughts when you are feeling bad and want to write on something. =) That would make things a little better for you sweet pea. =)
Well we will see everyone on Saturday k love bug!! Love you =)

Jamie(Sister) said...

Oops forgot

Jennifer said...

I think I would have written it BIGGER! I can only imagine what you are going through. I can certainly empathize with your Mommy about whether to laugh or cry. It always hurts the parents when they truly find out from "the mouth of babes" how much their children where really hurting. Last night we were at Chili's and thought of you. The kids donated money to St. Jude's last night. We love you so much and I hope that we can make it down there sometime soon!

Love you kiddo!
Jen, Billy, Emily, Robert, and Larry

Jennifer said...

Pssst! Now this is only for you Joshy! Next time...go quietly into Mommy's purse and see if she has any lipstick! ;)

Love you sweetie!